It's My Dog

Well, here we are back to Friday again!


This is one Friday I'm not especially looking forward to as I have to take my dog Zoe' to the Vet for a booster shot and check up.

How much does Zoe' enjoy her visit to the Vet? Not much, she swallows two Valiums prior to the trip.

That only takes the edge off and she is still ready to fight when she gets there.

Today in honor of Zoe's drug-induced trip to the Vet, I thought I would post some famous quotations in her honor.



-DOG QUOTATIONS-

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem.

- - - Edward Abbet


The dog was created especially for children. He is the god of frolic.

- - - Henry Ward Beecher "Proverbs from Plymouth Pulpit"


A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.

- - - Robert Benchley


A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.

- - - Josh Billings


The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him, and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too.

- - - Samuel Butler


On the green banks of Shannon, when Sheelah was nigh,
No blithe Irish lad was so happy as I;
No harp like my own could so cheerily play,
And wherever I went was my poor dog Tray.

- - - Thomas Campbell "The Harper"


Every dog has his day.

- - - Miguel de Cervantes


What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog.

- - - Dwight D. Eisenhower


The dog is mentioned in the Bible eighteen times -- the cat not even once.

- - - W. E. Farbstein


The silent dog is the first to bite.

- - - German Proverb


You call to a dog and a dog will break its neck to get to you. Dogs just want to please. Call to a cat and its attitude is, "What's in it for me?"

- - - Lewis Grizzard


In order to really enjoy a dog, one doesn't merely try to train him to be semihuman. The point of it is to open oneself to the possibility of becoming partly a dog.

- - - Edward Hoagland "Dogs and the Tug of Life"


To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs.

- - - Aldous Huxley


Pet a dog where he can't scratch and he'll always be your friend.

- - - Orville Mars


Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.

- - - Groucho Marx


No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as a dog does.

- - - Christopher Morley


Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways.

- - - Ogden Nash


A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

- - - Ogden Nash


Thus every dog at last will have his day -
He who this morning smiled, at night may sorrow;
The grub today's a butterfly tomorrow.

- - - Peter Pindar


I am his Highness' dog at Kew;
Pray tell me, sir, whose dog are you?

- - - Alexander Pope


It's funny how dogs and cats know the inside of folks better than other folks do, isn't it?

- - - Eleanor H. Porter "Pollyanna" 1912


The more I see of men, the more I admire dogs.

- - - Jeanne-Marie Roland


If dogs could talk it would take a lot of fun out of owning one.

- - - Andy Rooney


The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.

- - - Andy Rooney


That indefatigable and unsavory engine of pollution, the dog.

- - - John Sparrow


I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves.

- - - August Strindberg


The dog has seldom been successful in pulling man up to its level of sagacity, but man has frequently dragged a dog down to his.

- - - James Thurber


You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.

- - - Harry S Truman


If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principle difference between a dog and a man.

- - - Mark Twain


My little old dog:
A heart-beat at my feet.

- - - Edith Wharton


Bark: This is a sound made by dogs when excited. Dogs bark at milkmen, postmen, yourself, visitors to the house and other dogs; some of them bark at nothing. For some reason dogs tend not to bark at burglars, bailiffs and income tax collectors, at whom they wag their tails in the most friendly manner.

- - - Geoffrey Williams


Thou callest me a dog before thou hast cause.
But since I am a dog, beware my fangs.

- - - William Shakespeare "The Merchant of Venice"


Though on drugs, my dog will growl at the Vet and his skills she will test.

But in my eyes and in my heart, my dog Zoe' will always be the best!!

------Wag 2007




Well, that my friends as they say in Hollywood is a wrap!!

In keeping with the new trend I will give you the weekend off.
Please join me Monday for so much more of so much less!!

Men or Women

OK, who's smarter?


Man Chainsaws House in Two for Divorce

BERLIN - A 43-year-old German decided to settle his imminent divorce by chainsawing a family home in two and making off with his half in a forklift truck.

Police in the eastern town of Sonneberg said on Friday the trained mason measured the single-storey summer house -- which was some 26 feet long and 6 meters wide -- before chainsawing through the wooden roof and walls.

"The man said he was just taking his due, but I don't think his wife was too pleased."

After finishing the job, the man picked up his half with the forklift truck and drove to his brother's house where he has since been staying.

This is good stuff!! I sure hope he doesn't have any kids to divide up!!





Well, you can put an end to the Polish jokes because it appears some of them are smarter than you think!!

Polish lace-makers' modern twist: the thong

Say goodbye to traditional, stodgy doilies; say hello to racy G-strings

KONIAKOW, Poland - Delicate hand-stitched lace from this mountaintop village has long graced the altars of Polish churches and tables of Polish homes.


But now tradition has taken a modern twist with thongs, G-strings and other racy undergarments — offending some villagers but giving new life to a 200-year-old cottage industry.

“Lace wasn’t selling in the quantities it once did, and the tradition was starting to slowly disappear,” says Malgorzata Stanaszek, co-owner of KONI-art, the company that stitches the lingerie. “Our friend then said, as a half-joke, ’Why don’t you make thongs? They’re popular now.'"

Stanaszek, 32, recruited her mother and two sisters into the business, and they started stitching the thongs and selling them on the Internet in 2004. Now Stanaszek says she employs 65 women who work from home churning out lace panties, G-strings, thongs and bras for customers around the world. Orders come from across Europe and as far away as Japan, China, New Zealand and the United States; a Koniakow thong sells for about $20.

Stanaszek’s business shows no sign of slowing down. She plans to release a new collection this summer, and may launch a silk-lace line later in the year.

Smart, very smart. And just look at how many people she employs.

Nice handiwork!!

Fact: The thong accounts for 25% of the United States women's underwear market.

Fact: 3.9% of all women surveyed say they never wear underwear.




The following two stories may be an explanation of why 3.9 % don't wear underwear.


Wash. man steals 93 pounds of bras, panties

24-year-old charged with taking 1,500 undergarments from laundry rooms

PULLMAN, Wash. - A man was charged with theft and burglary after police said they found 93 pounds of women’s panties, brassieres and other underwear at his home.

Investigators believe Garth M. Flaherty, 24, took as many as 1,500 undergarments from apartment complex laundry rooms before he was caught, police Cmdr. Chris Tennant said.

Police found enough underwear in his bedroom to fill five garbage bags, Tennant said.

“We were kind of concerned about how to match up bras and panties with victims,” Tennant said. “Based on the unique descriptions from a couple of women, we can tie him to those thefts.”


Now this statement is a cliff hanger - "The unique descriptions from a couple of women..." Hmmmmm, gotta wonder what that means!!!!!!





Police Find Huge Cache of Stolen Underwear

TOKYO - Police found more than 4,000 pieces of lingerie in the home of a Japanese construction worker who used climbing skills developed on his job to steal women's underwear.

Police believe that Shigeo Kodama, 54, amassed the 3,977 panties, 355 bras and 10 pairs of stockings over a six-year period. He was arrested after he stole underwear from two houses, and police later raided his home.

"He didn't steal any other kinds of clothing. But as long as it was underwear, apparently anything would do," the spokesman added.

Interesting, in the United states the theft is measured in pounds and in Japan it's measured in the number of pieces stolen.

Between the pieces and pounds that totals 5842 items of ladies undergarments!!

I wonder if sales were up at Victoria's secret?



Fact: 57% of British women wear a D-cup bra. Only 10% of Italian women wear a D-cup.

Fact: The two highest IQs ever recorded (on a standard test) both belong to women.

I would say the previous stories would tend to support that fact!!!

I guess we now know who is smarter!!!!



We are on the downhill side of the week and it is almost time to kick back.

Speaking of back, come back here tomorrow for more of something!!

A Lighter Side Blog for You

Woo Hoo!!!!!!!!!!

You know you are never too old to have a little fun, and no one will suspect an older person did this:

The next time you are in Wal-Mart set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten-minute intervals throughout the day.

This, my friends, is a classic!



Want to have a little more fun?

Turn all the radios to hard rock stations. Then turn them off and turn the volume up to full blast.

This is good stuff and remember, it's ok to still have fun!

Best of all they will suspect a kid did it, so for a short time we get to be a kid again!!




Speaking of clocks:

How is the United States Postal Service handling the problem of long customer wait times at the post office?

Fact: They are removing all the clocks from their facilities.


Speaking of having fun, check out this tattoo artist's sense of humor:

An Argentine soccer fan was furious when he discovered that instead of his favorite team's logo, a tattoo artist had etched a penis on his back.

The tattoo artist was a fan of a rival club. The underage victim said he did not realize the artist's chicanery until he went home and showed the tattoo to his parents.

Man that is good stuff!! Hey Mom and Dad, check out this fantastic tattoo.

Mom, Mom, wake up! Dad, Dad, Mom fainted!!!




A classic case of the workers being on the wrong side of the fence:

A company that helped build a fourteen-mile border fence between California and Mexico has agreed to pay almost $5,000,000 in fines for hiring hundreds of illegal immigrant workers.

"We do consider... that immigration can't be stopped with a fence."
- Mexican President Felipe Calderon.

No duh!!! Too bad our politicians don't consider that!!




Speaking of Mexico!! My segue to a catered party serving Mexican food at the new Skywalk at the Grand Canyon!!




Ricardo's is a family-owned foodservice company established in 1979.

My friend Sara is one of the family, and her restaurant catered the party for the dedication of the Skywalk at the Grand Canyon.


She was kind enough to share these pictures for your viewing.




When asked how was everything there, Sara answered the food was great.

I said, no I know that Ricardo's food is always good, I meant how was the Skywalk?

Her response: "I walked out on it...it was very scary!"

Sara is a very smart girl, however the fact that she went out on it in the first place makes me want to rethink the very smart part!!!!!!!

Just kidding Sara, thanx for sharing!!



OK, that's the way it is for this hump day Wednesday.

Just remember this:

The Forecast for tonight: dark.

The Forcast for tomorrow morning: light


Join me again tomorrow and see the light!!!

This Ain't No TV Dinner

OK, before you enter the Twilight Zone, keep in mind all my posts can't be gems!!



Feds Say Too Few Eating Fruits, Vegetables

ATLANTA - Fewer than a third of American adults eat the amount of fruits and vegetables the government recommends, a trend that's remained steady for more than a decade, health officials said Thursday. That's "well below" the government's goal of getting 75 percent of Americans to eat two servings of fruits and having half of the population consume three servings of vegetables each day by 2010, said Dr. Larry Cohen of the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention

The federal agency said it doesn't know why people aren't eating more veggies or fruits. Cohen said future surveys will ask people what other foods they are eating.


You know how many times I say people don't know how to think anymore?

The government doesn't know why people aren't eating more veggies or fruits but they never bothered to ask. Finally someone suggested they ask in their next survey!! Duh!!!!!!!

Could it be the fruit and veggies don't have the taste they used to?



Based on the following stories it appears when future surveys ask people what other foods they are eating, meat is meat will be the answer.


Honey I'm home - what's for dinner tonight??

You are dear, you are!!


Medium well please:

Housewife Convicted of Frying Husband

SAO PAULO, Brazil - A Brazilian housewife was convicted and sentenced to 19 years in prison Friday for killing her husband, chopping his body into small pieces and frying it.

Rosanita Nery dos Santos, 52, drugged her husband in his sleep, she then hacked Jose Raimundo Soares dos Santos' body into more than 100 pieces, which she boiled and fried.

I guess no one ever told her fried food is not healthy for you.

Might as well have fries with that!

I wonder if she had friends over for dinner?




Well done please:

Slain Student Dismembered, Burned on Grill

HOUSTON - A 19-year-old Texas A&M University student was killed by her ex-boyfriend, who then dismembered and burned her body on a patio grill.

Hey come on over for beer and a backyard barbecue!! Grill the onions please!

This recipe calls for lots and lots of Tabasco.





And to wash those meals down, try a double shot of this:

Ga. jury convicts woman in antifreeze death

Former 911 operator faces death penalty in boyfriend’s killing

DALTON, Ga. - A former 911 operator was convicted Saturday of murdering her boyfriend by poisoning him with antifreeze.



Fact: The United States has five percent of the world's population, but twenty-five percent of the world's prison population.



So it goes for today. Throw me a bone, that is all I had.

Return tomorrow for more nonsense or nosense!!!!

Sunday Fun

Doggie Day Trip

Let me tell you what a good time I had Sunday.

At 8:30 A.M. we set out with our dog and 8 friends with their dogs for a day trip.

Our first stop was in Nipton, California, to walk the dogs, have a smoke break, and purchase lotto tickets.

From there, after a wrong turn and a u-turn, we were off to our destination of Kelso, California.

Yeah Yeah I was leading when we went the wrong direction!!


Kelso is a ghost town and defunct railroad depot in the Mojave National Preserve in California. It was named after a railroad worker who won a contest to have the town named after him. The town was built specifically as a railroad station because of its location and nearby springs that provided abundant water.

Starting off as what was a simple train depot in the 1920's, the town of Kelso boomed briefly to as many as 2000 residents in the 1940s when borax and iron mines opened nearby. Gold and silver were also discovered in the nearby hills of what became known as the Kelso district. The town shrank again when the mines closed after about a decade.


Kelso was a base of operations for the Los Angeles and Salt Lake Railroad (now part of the Union Pacific). Here, trains were watered and "helper" locomotives were attached to assist the regular trains in climbing the steep Cima Hill. The distance between Las Vegas and the connection with the Santa Fe line at Daggett was too far for trains without a meal car, so Kelso was a convenient spot for a restaurant stop.

The depot building itself was built in 1923 using a Spanish "California mission" building style. It contained boarding rooms for railroad employees and a restaurant for both employees and passengers. It also had a telegraph office and waiting room. Later, a restaurant nicknamed the "Beanery," that served home-style meals was housed in the building. The large rooms in the basement also served as a community center for local residents.

The depot remained in operation until 1986. It was recently renovated to become a park visitor center. Renovation was completed in 2005 and is now open to the public.

During the 1970s Kelso was known as the town without television. About 75 residents lived in Kelso, many with school age children. Television signals could not reach the town which meant that residents found other methods of recreation. Children played outside until dark. Adults sat outside and talked together.



The once famous beanery was closed,


but fortunately we had all packed a picnic lunch, and after walking the people and dogs, we settled in for our lunch.



After lunch we all took in the historical Depot.



If you haven't been there you might want to consider checking it out for its historical value.

If you haven't taken a day trip with friends in a while, you might want to do that as well as it is a lot of fun.

Thanks to my wife and all the friends who made it such a fun day!!

See you back here tomorrow!!

Over Here, Over There

It's Friday Casual Day so let's bounce here and there!!




Fact: 82% of Americans made a purchase at Wal-Mart in 2002.

That fact was from 2002 - the percentage is higher now!!

OK I'm just ask'n,

Wal-Mart is non-union and union people are supposed to boycott shopping at non-union stores, so does that mean that only 18% of Americans are union members?

Fact: In 21 states, Wal-Mart is the single largest employer.

All I read and hear is how towns don't want Wal-Mart opening stores in their cities. I also read and hear that the unions need to represent the Wal-Mart workers. With the fact that Wal-Mart is the single largest employer In 21 states why would what I have read be true?




Fact: Dogs and cats consume almost $7 billion worth of pet food a year.

That fact being said, then I ask how can something like the following happen?

Why are there not better controls in place?

Pet Food Tests Kill Seven Animals, Feds Say

WASHINGTON - As many as one in six animals died in tests of suspect dog and cat food by the manufacturer after complaints the products were poisoning pets around the country, the government said.



Menu Foods suggested the timing of the pet deaths was tied to its use of a new supplier for wheat gluten, a source of protein. It didn't name the supplier.

And why wouldn't it name the supplier?

The United States news media draws a map in the sand on world television showing our route of invasion into Iraq, but no one will name the supplier for wheat gluten!!

Am I missing something there?





Fact: In an effort to encourage the use of nuclear energy, the United States lent highly enriched uranium to countries all over the world between 1950 and 1988.

Enough weapons-grade material to make 1,000 nuclear bombs has still not been returned by such countries as Pakistan, Iran, Israel and South Africa.

The United States is such a giving country. Giving to others, that is. What ever happened to living by the code 'charity begins at home?'

Great countries eventually destroy themselves from within!!!




As with all States, we in the Silver State Of Nevada strive to be number one, however, not in this category:

No. 1 -- Nevada
Nevada may not have the highest murder rate, but its crime rankings across the board offer the highest odds of a crime against you and your family.

Rankings by Crime
Murder: 3
Rape: 11
Robbery: 2
Assault: 13
Burglary: 7
Motor Vehicle Theft: 1




Speaking of Las Vegas, the following are pictures from our own McCarran airport.





Those Toyota trucks have so much power the driver forgets he has a trailer in tow!!!

Math is hard here, the owner must have stood inside the trailer at one time and noticed the ceiling to be at least 7' high on the inside not including the insulation space so lets be less than generous and add only 6".

Let's see, the trailer has wheels that raise it off the ground, which you would notice when you use a step to gain entrance, so let's be less than generous and add only 2' to the top of the floor. Now the two orange signs say 8'2" clearance.

Now I understand when they worry the school test scores are so low.

What is even stupider, at the top of the ramp is a parking garage which like all parking garages, is difficult to navigate with the truck alone!!




Speaking of Las Vegas, good luck to the University Of Nevada Las Vegas tonight in their quest to make it to the Elite 8 in men's basketball.

Go Rebels!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In keeping with my new found freedom, there will not be weekend posts. Join me again Monday for something more or less!!!!

Activist Right

They call themselves animal rights activists?

Give me a break!!!!!


Activist Says Zoo 'Must Kill' Baby Polar Bear

BERLIN - Berlin Zoo's abandoned polar bear cub Knut looks cute, cuddly and has become a front-page media darling, but an animal rights activist insisted Monday he would have been better off dead than raised by humans.






"Feeding by hand is not species-appropriate but a gross violation of animal protection laws," animal rights activist Frank Albrecht was quoted as saying.

"The zoo must kill the bear."

When Knut - or "Cute Knut," as the 8.7 kilogram (19 pound) bear has become known - was born last December, his mother ignored him and his brother, who later died. Zoo officials intervened, choosing to raise the cub themselves.

The story prompted quick condemnations from the zoo, politicians and other animal rights groups.

"The killing of an animal has nothing to do with animal protection," said Wolfgang Apel, head of the German Federation for the Protection of Animals.

"If a polar bear mother rejected the baby, then I believe the zoo must follow the instincts of nature," Albrecht said. "In the wild, it would have been left to die."

The German animal rights organization "Four Paws" argued along similar lines, saying it would not be right to punish the cub for a bad decision made by the zoo.

Other activists have also argued that current treatment of the cub is inhumane and could lead to future difficulties interacting with fellow polar bears.

"They cannot domesticate a wild animal," Ruediger Schmiedel, head of the Foundation for Bears, told Der Spiegel weekly in its Monday edition.

But Knut belongs to the Berlin Zoo, and their veterinarian Andre Schuele, charged with caring for him, disagrees.

"These criticisms make me angry, but you can't take them so seriously," Andre Schuele said. "Polar bears live alone in the wild; I see no logical reason why this bear should be killed."

Schuele also argued that given the increased rarity of polar bears in the wild, it makes sense to keep them alive in captivity so that they can be bred.

"Polar bears are under threat of extinction, and if we feed the bear with a bottle, it has a good chance of growing up and perhaps becoming attractive as a stud for other zoos," Schuele said.

They call themselves animal rights activists? I think not.

A true animal rights activist would only suggest euthanasia if the animal was dying or in pain!!!!!

Fact: All polar bears are left handed.




I wonder what the animal rights activists think about this:

Unlikely Pals


A piglet and a tiger cub play at a park March 13 in Guangzhou, China. The cub was abandoned by its mother and is being raised by a sow.

The animal rights activist would argue "In the wild, it would have been left to die." Hello, anyone looking? They aren't in the wild!! Duh!!





Big heart

Tiniest horse saddled with charitable mission

Owners of smallest equine aim to raise $1 million for children's causes

ST. LOUIS - At just a hair over 17 inches tall, the miniature horse is more inclined to walk under fences than jump them.


And her owners have sheltered the mare from ever gaining “circus-sideshow” or “one-trick-pony” status.

As the world’s smallest horse, 5-year-old Thumbelina, weighing in at 57 pounds, has a bigger mission: to raise $1 million for children’s charities this year.

Most of her days are spent playing with like-sized farm dogs. She even sleeps in a dog house.


$10,000 banked for charities so far
The tiny horse and her charitable foundation have helped raise about $10,000 for children’s charities since she gained world record status as the smallest horse ever recorded, at 17½ inches at the withers.

An upcoming “Thumbelina Children’s Tour” is expected to include stops in the 48 contiguous states at children’s hospitals, schools, summer camps, fairs, horse shows and charitable fundraisers.


Great story and doing good things for good charities.

Let's hope the animal rights activists mind their own business on this one!!!





Man Shares Golf Cart With Bobcat

CAPE GIRARDEAU, Mo. - It's best not to get between a predator and its prey - especially when they're in the passenger seat of your golf cart.

Water plant worker Mitch Walter would offer that bit of advice and bears the scratches of one who speaks from experience.

As Walter was inspecting the Cape Rock Water Treatment Plant property Tuesday night, a rabbit leaped into his golf cart - followed by a 25-pound bobcat. The rabbit then jumped back out, leaving Walter alone with a large, frightened feline.

"The cat went from a sleek predator after fast food to a ball of fur trying to jump through the windshield of the golf cart," Walter said.

Walter received scratches on his neck while shoving the bobcat out, necessitating a round of rabies shots, but was otherwise unhurt.

The rabbit must have played the hare and the hound game so when the cat tried to play, the rabbit out "foxed" her!!

Those animal rights activists need to get that rabbit.


Fact: 72% of Americans sign their pets' names on greeting cards they send out.



Those are my rants for today. Hope to see you tomorrow for more of nothing!!

Outrageous Food Stories

You have got to be kidding me, big business has gone stupid.

Target shifts Muslims who won’t ring up pork

Department stores in Minn. reassign some cashiers over religious conflict

MINNEAPOLIS - Muslim cashiers at some local Target stores who object to ringing up products that contain pork are being shifted to other positions where they don’t need to, the discount retailer said Saturday.

Some Muslim cashiers at local Targets had declined to scan pork products such as bacon because doing so would conflict with their religious beliefs. They would ask other cashiers to ring up such purchases, or sometimes customers would scan those items themselves.

Minneapolis-based Target Corp. has now offered its local Muslim cashiers who object to handling pork the option of wearing gloves while cashiering, shifting to other positions or transferring to other nearby stores.

“We are confident that this is a reasonable solution for our guests and team members,” Target spokeswoman Paula Thornton-Greear said in a statement e-mailed to The Associated Press on Saturday.

Greear said it was a localized problem and that it would be handled on a case-by-case basis.

“It is not an issue in most of our stores in the Twin Cities,” she said in separate comments via e-mail. “There is also no indication that this is an issue in the Minnesota market overall or nationwide.”

Islam teaches that pigs are unclean and eating pork is a sin, and some Muslims feel selling or handling pork is also forbidden because it would make them complicit in the sins of others.

Collision of work and faith
As the local Muslim population grows, fueled by immigration from East African countries such as Somalia, efforts by Muslims to live by the rules of their faith often come into conflict with the realities of the American workplace.

Disputes over how employers should accommodate prayer times surface from time to time, and there’s an ongoing dispute involving cab drivers who serve Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport—many of whom are Muslim—who refuse to take passengers who are carrying alcohol.

The Metropolitan Airports Commission is expected to vote in April on a proposal that would hand out 30-day license suspensions to cabbies who refuse service for any reason, with a second refusal leading to a two-year revocation.

Suhara Robla, who works at the SuperTarget in St. Louis Park, told the Star Tribune that more than a dozen Muslim cashiers were asked Thursday to do other jobs.

“They told all of us who don’t touch pork to go to the sales floor,” she told the newspaper. “They really didn’t say why. They just said it was a new policy.”

Worker walks over issue
Muse Dahir told the AP this past week he quit his job at the Sam’s Club in Bloomington after he was transferred from another position to cashiering and was ordered to ring up pork purchases.

Several times on his first day as a cashier, Dahir said, said customers brought pork products to his register. He asked them to take their goods to another register, and a customer complained to management.

“They told me, you have to check this,” Dahir said. “I told them, I can’t do this. You want me to do something that’s against my religion.”

Dahir said a manager told him that was part of the job, so “I just put down my uniform and I left.”

He said it doesn’t matter if the pork product is packaged. “Even if you just sell it to someone, you break a promise to Allah,” he said.

Jama Omar, a clerk at Otanga Grocery in Minneapolis, told the AP his store caters mostly to East African immigrants and doesn’t carry pork products, so it’s not an issue for him personally. But Omar also said Muslims shouldn’t expect special treatment.

“If it causes a big problem for your employer, they have to make the decision that’s best for them,” Omar said. “It’s not something to go on strike or file a civil suit. Go somewhere else that will accept your beliefs. There’s millions of jobs.”

Omar seems like a smart guy. When you hire on at a job you know what is expected and I wonder why Target has no backbone!!

Good job Sam's club for forcing the issue, and as far as the cabbies go, let them find other work as well.

Why do we in the United States change our way of business for these people?

If they don't like the rules, get another job or get your asses out of this country!!!!

My religon says I should not work, just party, so I need to receive a paycheck for that. I wonder who's hiring?






Men Arrested After Fleeing Waffle House

RICHMOND, Ky. - A bizarre incident at a Waffle House led to four Lexington men being cited by police following a high-speed chase. Devin Chenault, 21, Shawn Caldwell, 18, Robert Greer, 19, and Marcus Graves, 18, were sitting at the counter in the restaurant early Friday morning when a fight between two girls broke out.

A restaurant employee flagged down nearby police officers to help break up the fight, and when the officers entered the restaurant the four men took off without paying their nearly $100 tab.

OK OK I've eaten at a Waffle House and I cannot understand how they could run up a $100 tab. The most expensive thing on the menu is 10 bucks.

But then again, if they ate at the one I did maybe their food was as bad as mine so they kept trying things waiting for the perfect waffle.





More stealing:

Catfish Assault Reported at Diner

BULLS GAP, Tenn. - The folks at Di's Diner were assaulted with a catfish dinner of their own making.

Employee Tina Henry and owner Dwight Jenkins told authorities a "blond, heavy-frame female" tried to slip out of their Bulls Gap eatery, about 60 miles northeast of Knoxville, with a pilfered catfish meal Friday night.

"Tina states that as the suspect was paying, they told her she would have to pay for the dinner in her purse.

"She then became mad, throwing money at the cash register. The suspect then walked outside, and Tina and Dwight followed," the report said.

"The suspect then threw the fish out of her purse at Tina, hitting her in the back." Henry wasn't hurt, but the $7.99 catfish dinner was ruined.

Good job Tina, way to call her out!!

I know a woman that fills her purse at the buffet and takes it home under the pretext that since she paid she should be able to take what she wants!!

Then again she is on disability and more healthy than most, so it is no surprise that she thinks it OK!!





Speaking of food, do you think this guy really ordered liver?

Body parts meant for lab sent to Michigan home — and there may be more

CASCADE TOWNSHIP, Mich. - Two packages containing human body parts — including a liver and part of a head — meant for a medical research lab instead were delivered to a home.

The body parts, sent from China, were mistakenly dropped off Thursday at Franck and Ludivine Larmande's home by a DHL express driver who believed the bubble-wrapped items were pieces to a table.

"My husband started to unwrap one and said, 'This is strange, it looks like a liver,'" Ludivine Larmande said. "He started the second one but stopped as soon as we saw the ear.

"Something wasn't right. It was scary, and I'm glad I didn't open them."

The couple called Kent County sheriff's deputies, who determined the preserved body parts were for medical research, Lt. Roger Parent said.

Authorities believe 28 more bubble-wrapped human organs and body parts could be dispersed across the country, The Grand Rapids Press reported. Two of five packages headed to the northern Michigan lab broke open, scattering their contents.

"There will definitely be a shock to people if they see these things, but there is no hazard to health," Parent said.

DHL is investigating whether it should have shipped the body parts and how the packages were distributed, spokesman Robert Mints said.

It doesn't surprise me, I used DHL once and never again. They are the worst!!

Good thing Mike Tyson wasn't there. He would have thought the ear was gourmet!!

"But there is no hazard to health," Parent said. Ha, there would be at my house if I opened that. It would be a heart attack that was a hazard to my health!!!



And there you go for today. Be back tomorrow for more of my rants!!!!!!!

Facts, Facts, and More Facts

Fact:

Did you know people will believe anything if you whisper it?

So put your ear next to your speaker as we proceed!!!


Man Accidentally Glues Self to Roof

BERLIN - A 91-year-old German man was rescued Tuesday from a sticky situation.

The retiree from the eastern city of Magdeburg had been taking advantage of good spring weather to re-tar the roof of his garden house when he slipped and became glued to the structure himself.

At 91 years old he shouldn't be on the roof to start with!!!




Fact: We forget 80 percent of what we learn everyday.

Maybe that is the problem with the previous story and the following story!!!




Town Fixes Sign With 20-Year-Old Typo

HAGERSTOWN, Md. - The city of Hagerstown corrected a municipal spelling error Thursday, 20 years after committing it.

A sign directing drivers to "Municpal Stadium" was replaced with one displaying the proper spelling, Erik Kline, city traffic control supervisor, said.

The sign was first placed at the corner of Frederick Street and East Memorial Boulevard in the mid to late 1980s, but the error went uncorrected until Hagerstown's Herald-Mail brought it to City Hall's attention this week, prompted by a reader's complaint.

Kline said the longtime tolerance for the misspelled sign doesn't reflect poorly on the western Maryland city of 38,000.

"I think it was a mistake that was made. I don't know that it necessarily makes us look bad," Kline said.

Quick studies - only took 20 years to notice!

Kline is right, it doesn't make them look bad, it makes them look stupid!!!

I bet their school test scores suck!!




Speaking of educated people, who goofed here?

Fact: The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because when it was built engineers failed to take into account the weight of all the books that would occupy the building.

Higher education at its best!!!!

Duh!!!!!




Speaking of being smart, I was going to go to Hawaii one of these days but I am going to save money and wait and go when Hawaii and Japan merge.


Fact: Hawaii is moving toward Japan 4 inches every year.

I think it may be too slow for me!!




Baseball season is starting so I thought I would give you a few more interesting facts:

In 1920, Babe Ruth broke the single season home run record, with 29.
The same year, he became the first major leaguer to hit 30 home runs.
The same year, he became the first major leaguer to hit 40 home runs.
The same year, he became the first major leaguer to hit 50 home runs.

Not bad, but guess what else he did in 1920.

In 1920, Babe Ruth out-homered every American League team.

No steroids, just beer and whiskey!!!!!



Speaking of booze:

Fact: George Washington spent about 7% of his annual salary on liquor.


Prolonged drunk:

Russian scientists have developed a new drug that prolongs drunkenness and enhances intoxication.

Fact: 1.5 million Americans are charged with drunk driving each year.


Now here's a great idea!!

Hot pink plates for busted drunk drivers?

Arkansas proposal would affect anyone convicted three or more times

LITTLE ROCK, Ark. - It'd be easy to spot those convicted of drunken-driven offenses under a measure proposed by one Arkansas lawmaker:

Hot pink license plates, starting with the letters DWI, would be issued to repeat offenders.

The proposal, by Rep. Pam Adcock, D-Little Rock, would require anyone convicted three or more times of driving while intoxicated to display the pink DWI license plates on his or her car.

"The DWI license plate shall be a bright pink color that is easily distinguishable from other license plates issued in the state," the bill says.

This ought to be a federal law and ought to apply to first time offenders nationwide!

This only affects anyone convicted three or more times. I ask you, why are they allowed to be driving and out of jail if they have been convicted three or more times?

Something wrong there!!!!



I'm sure that is all the information anyone could want to know, so I will close today with a suggestion - plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.

And of course, come back for more of less tomorrow!!

Who's the Hooker?

The oldest profession used to be one of integrity!!!


What ever happened to that?

Accused madam: Deal done on client records

News organization in agreement not specified; D.C. notables could be listed

WASHINGTON - The former owner of an escort business said she has reached a deal to share her records of up to 15,000 client phone numbers with a media organization.

Palfrey said that in her time operating the business, she used discretion and confidentiality about who her clients were. But now, with her assets frozen by the government, she said she needs to leverage the list to help with her defense.

This is wrong, totally wrong!!!!

It appears no one's word is good anymore.

She thinks she should be paid twice.





Another Madam that does not know the meaning of the word discreet:

Apparently Tommy Lasorda Likes Hitting Doubles



The LA Times reported about a book written by Hollywood madam Jody "Babydol" Gibson due out Thursday that suggests former Dodgers' manager Tommy Lasorda was a customer of her escort service. Apparently chapter 12 has specific details about one of Lasorda's requests.

Because I have a "G" rated blog I won't quote his request! What's the big deal? Maybe his wife OK'd it!!!

Trust no one I guess is the new order of the world. Shameful, just shameful.





Ambassador Recalled Amid Lurid Report

Conduct Called 'Unbecoming of a Diplomat'

JERUSALEM - Israel has recalled its ambassador in El Salvador after he was found drunk and naked with sex toys lying nearby in the yard of his official residence, Israeli media reports said on Monday.

A foreign ministry spokeswoman confirmed that the ambassador, Tsuriel Raphael, was recalled but offered no details. "The ministry sees his behavior as unbecoming of a diplomat," the spokeswoman said.

Israeli media reported that local police found Raphael in the yard of the official residence in San Salvador. The reports said he was drunk, naked, and bound and gagged with a rubber ball in his mouth and sex toys lying near him.

The ambassador was recalled to Israel. "He is going to remain in Israel," she said.

Wow, I don't get it! What's the fuss? Maybe he was being held hostage!!

I could see Jack Bauer framing someone this way!!





Cards Assistant Arrested in Prostitution Sting

Anderson Booked for Soliciting Undercover Cop

PHOENIX - Former NFL running back Richie Anderson, now an assistant coach with the Arizona Cardinals, was arrested during a Phoenix police anti-prostitution operation.


Anderson, 35, was arrested for soliciting prostitution. The department's vice unit was conducting an undercover sting operation in south Phoenix when Anderson allegedly solicited an officer posing as a prostitute.

Update: Cards coach Richie Anderson fired for soliciting a prostitute.

A little harsh wouldn't you say?

At least he thought he was going to a pro rather than just raping a woman like a lot of athletes do nowadays!!!!




OK, the ones hurt in these stories are the wives. For the men, rest assured paybacks will be costly!!!!!


But I ask you, which is worse, that or this:

FBI confirms investigation of Nevada governor
Inquiry focusing on Gov. Gibbons’s role in awarding secret military contracts

Lt. Gov. Brian Krolicki
CARSON CITY -- State Treasurer Kate Marshall said Wednesday that nearly $3.4 million in Nevada college savings trust fees that should have been state revenue were diverted by her predecessor, Brian Krolicki, for unauthorized legal expenditures and marketing costs.

Senator Harry Reid
Fight freebie defended
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid was dodging punches again Tuesday, this time trying to justify his acceptance of free admission to high-profile professional boxing matches in Las Vegas.

Group files FEC complaint against Reid over use of campaign funds
A conservative group filed a complaint with the Federal Election Commission against Sen. Harry Reid of Nevada for using $3,300 in campaign funds to pay Christmas bonuses to employees at his condominium.

Timing is everything in Harry Reid's profitable partnership deal
Sen. Reid on the hot seat
He possibly committed a congressional ethics violation for failing to fully disclose the transfer of land he owned to a partnership in which he held a financial position.

Reid: Accepting corporate travel OK, but looks bad
Sen. Harry Reid, D-Nev., said he saw nothing wrong with accepting travel on corporate jets.

The list goes on and on. You be the judge!!!

I ask you "Who are the real prostitutes here?"


What a start for the week!!

Stop by again tomorrow for much more of nothing much!!!

He's Gone Off the Deep End

OK strap on your seat belt and cinch it up tight because we are bouncing all over the place today.



Burning Question:

I attended a funeral last weekend and listened as the Bishop and the Stake President (Mormon) talked about how great Heaven is.

That made me wonder, "if Heaven is real and it is so great why do we eat healthy to live longer?"

That question raised the next question:

"Why don't scientists work on speeding up the aging process so we die within a few days of being born so we can go to Heaven?"

Yeah Yeah I will get mail on that one!!



Check out these stats:

Barbie's measurements (if she were life-size): 39-23-33

The company that manufactures the greatest number of women's dresses each year is Mattel. Barbie's got to wear something.

I got that info from Ken. You know Barbie got the Corvette when she dumped Ken!!



Trouble brewing!!

Have you ever wondered why so many women are the ones who make the coffee?

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

Get it?

Yeah Yeah I will get mail on that one too!!

Bloggers are a brave bunch of idiots!!!



Before computers, Spam came in a can and did not taste like Ham!!

The New York Times reports that in February 2004, 62% of all e-mail was Spam.

Do you wonder why everything costs more these days when computers were hailed as cost saving?

The time spent deleting SPAM costs United States businesses $21.6 billion annually.

That's why everything costs more these days !!!



Speaking of spending (wasting) money:

Last December, the House of Representatives earmarked $50,000,000 to create an indoor rain forest in Iowa.

Hmmm I don't get it!!



Speaking of water or lack thereof:

Seven percent of Americans claim they never bathe at all.

That last story smells to me!! Who are the 7% that admitted to that?



Cells not the phone type!

The longest living cells in the body are brain cells which can live an entire lifetime.

I know a lot of dead people walking!!



Is it any wonder General Motors is about to go bankrupt?

At General Motors, the cost of health care for employees now exceeds the cost of steel.



Speaking of driving or not driving as the case might be:

An average American will spend an average of 6 months during his lifetime waiting at red lights.



Where is OSHA when you need them?

The leading cause of on-the-job deaths in workplaces in America is homicide.

I believe the phrase goes something like this, "so and so has a job that is to die for!!"



Did you know,

Hoover Dam was built to last 2,000 years. Its concrete will not be fully cured for another 500 years.



Also did you know,

The biggest dog on record was an Old English Mastiff that weighed 343 pounds.

He was 8 feet, 3 inches from nose to tail.



Does this scare you?

20% of Americans think that the Sun orbits around the Earth.



I always say the people in this country have lost the ability to think.
Here is another prime example:


Has it gotten so bad we need a sign posted to tell us what is obvious?

Have we become that stupid?

When you reach this point, what do you do?




That's it for today.

Once again due to a drop in readers over the weekends I too shall take the weekend off!!

Blog Site

The site is not working right so my normal post will not be here today. If it starts working right there will be a post tomorrow. Sorry!!!

Let's Get Wasted

We have all heard how the use of drugs can fry your mind.

I offer you proof that statement is true!

Unzipped fly leads officers to pot stash

Pipe, drugs found in man’s underwear

SHEBOYGAN, Wis. - Too bad nobody told him his fly was down. A 22-year-old man was arrested for drug possession after police found a marijuana pipe and drugs stashed in his underwear.

Police made the arrest after they found the man's car stuck in a ditch in the Town of Wilson. According to a criminal complaint, the man's pants were undone and officers asked if there was anything illegal in his clothing. They found a pipe and a small amount of marijuana.

At age 22 he has suffered burn out at an early age!!!

'I am sick of these low-lifes stealing my things’

New Zealand woman’s tale of stolen pot plants leaves police smiling

WELLINGTON, New Zealand - A middle-aged New Zealand woman rang police to report a theft of cannabis plants she had been growing at her North Island home, local media reported.

The crying woman told a constable at the police station in the city of Napier the plant theft was the fourth from her property in as many years. The 45-year-old woman, who was not named, lamented someone had again sneaked on to her property at night to steal her three carefully nurtured marijuana plants.

"I am a good person. I am sick of these low-lifes stealing my things," the woman told a police communications officer.

Senior Sgt. Mal Lochrie told local media Friday that the officer found it hard to stop smiling as the women gave details of the theft over the phone.

At middle age the burn out gets progressively worse!!

Speaking of burn out:

Busted! Car with pot in trunk hits trooper's car

54-year-old caught with 43 pounds of marijuana after South Carolina crash.

ORANGEBURG, S.C. - It might have been one of the easiest drug busts in the history of the South Carolina Highway Patrol: A car with 43 pounds of marijuana crashed into a trooper’s cruiser.

The easy bust happened after two patrolmen parked their cars in each lane of northbound Interstate 95 near Santee early Sunday morning following a series of wrecks that had tied up traffic.

A Chevrolet Malibu going about 70 mph hit one of the cruisers, causing minor injuries to the trooper behind the wheel, Williamson said.

Officers found two large duffel bags in the trunk with 43 pounds of marijuana in plastic bags, worth more than $150,000. They also found a few marijuana cigarettes and cocaine.

Wow this would be a case of older burn out gone to the extreme!!

Now isn't this guy one of the most brilliant people you have ever heard about?

His mug shot reminds me of someone connected to the Hollywood scene!!

Dude! A meth fire! Quick — drive to Wal-Mart!

Man cruises to store to get extinguisher when meth lab flames up.

CHANDLER, Ariz. - A man who started a small fire while cooking methamphetamine drove to a Wal-Mart to buy a fire extinguisher when he couldn't put out the flames.

Jonathan Zaletel, 19, was greeted by Maricopa County deputies when he returned to his condominium late Tuesday, Lt. Paul Chagolla said.

The flames had been extinguished by a sprinkler system, and arriving firefighters found a small meth lab in the closet.

A toaster being used to cook the drug had caught fire, Chagolla said, and Zalatel had tried putting it out using water and window cleaner before deciding to go buy the fire extinguisher.

Zalatel was booked on suspicion of manufacturing dangerous drugs, possession of chemicals and equipment to manufacture dangerous drugs, possession of drug paraphernalia, possession of marijuana and criminal damage.

This is a clear indication of how bad meth is - this guy is 19 and way burned out.

Do you suppose this idiot figured the fire would wait until he got back from Wal-Mart?

What scares me is I actually know a few people that I could see them as the person described in one or more of these stories!!

Does it remind any of you of anyone you know??

These stories remind me of the Freddie Fender song "Wasted Days And Wasted Nights."

Or the famous Joe Cocker song "I get by with a little help from my friends and I get high with a little help from my friends!"

The mind is a terrible thing to waste so don't waste yours, return tomorrow for a lot more of nothing much!!!

Weird Laws

OK let's take a look at something different today.

This is especially important information if you travel, so pay close attention.


Check out these weird laws right here in the United States:


Pacific Grove, California - It causes a misdemeanor if you kill or threaten a butterfly.

Ventura County, California - Cats or dogs can't have sex without a permit.

Sarasota, Florida - It is illegal to wear swimwear while singing in a public place.

Chicago, Illinois - A hat pin is considered a concealed weapon.

Michigan - It is illegal for a woman to cut her hair without her husband's consent.

Minnesota - It is illegal to mock skunks.

Brainerd, Minnesota - Every man must grow a beard.

Ohio - It is illegal to sell beer while wearing a Santa Claus suit, even if you are a dog.

Seattle, Washington - It is illegal to sell lollipops. Suckers are fine.

Virginia - All bathtubs must be outside, not in the house.

Cleveland, Ohio - It is illegal to capture mice without a hunting license.

Arizona - It is illegal to hunt camels.

Kentucky - It is illegal to carry an ice cream cone in your pocket.

Louisana - It is illegal to rob a bank, and then shoot the teller with a water pistol.

Indiana - It is prohibited to bathe in the winter.

Kentucky - You must take a bath at least once a year.

Alaska - It is illegal to look at a moose from a flying vehicle.

Atlanta, Georgia - is illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp.

Idaho - It is forbidden by law for one citizen to give another citizen a box of candy that weighs more than 50 pounds.

New York State - It is illegal to shoot a rabbit from a trolley car.

New Jersey - It is illegal to slurp soup.

Arkansas - A man is allowed to beat his wife, but no more than once a month.

Chicago, Illinois - It is illegal for a woman that weighs 200 pounds to ride horses in shorts.

Miami, Florida - It is illegal for a man to wear a strapless gown.

Mesquite, Texas - It is illegal for children to have unusual haircuts.

Connecticut - It is illegal to walk across the street on your hands.

North Carolina - You cannot sell cotton lint or cotton seed at night.

New York - It is illegal to do anything against the law.

Hartford, Connecticut - It is illegal to plant a tree in the street.

Christiansburg, Virginia - It is illegal to spit.

Provincetown, Massachusetts - it's illegal to sell suntan oil until after noon on Sunday.

San Fransisco - It is illegal to beat a rug in front of your house.

Kentucky - It is illegal for a woman to appear in a bathing suit on a highway unless she is:
A) escorted by at least two police officers.
B) armed with a club.
C) lighter than 90 pounds or more than 200 pounds

Maryland - It's illegal to play Randy Newman's "Short People" on the radio.

New Hampshire - It is illegal to dye margerine pink.

Seattle, Washington - Women who sit on men's laps on buses or trains without placing a pillow between them face an automatic 6 months in jail.

Texas - It is illegal to milk another person's cow.


Just remember we elect the people that make these laws, so what does that tell you?

See you back here tomorrow and remember this:

"That 'this government of the people, by the people, and for the people' shall live always."

"That men should live by the rule of what is best for the greatest number."

Mish Mash

Say it ain't so Joe!!!


Sharon Stone Bugged @ Flea Market


Hollywood must have some of the best makeup artists.





Speaking of Hollywood, and this is true, who do you think the latest person to claim that he might be the father of Anna Nicole Smith's baby?

Are you ready for this one? O.J. Simpson released a statement throwing his hat in the ring!!





Bang Bang:


I guess this is what they call a shotgun wedding!!

The groom was running away when the bride and her brothers took matters into their own hands!!





Eye check:

I know how you go from the one on the left to the one on the right.



But how in the world do you go from this one on the left to that one on the right?



Boy does that give you a headache? Speaking of headaches:

I stopped by my local drugstore last night and asked the pharmacist if he would give me something for my headache. He looked at me and said "Why, what would I do with it?"




Did you know?
In 1836, the Alamo in San Antonio fell to Mexican forces after a 13-day siege. History was repeated again in 2006.




THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:

"The American Indians found out what happens when you don't control immigration."





QUESTION FOR THE DAY:

NASCAR just finished a big race here in Vegas this weekend which leads me to the question of the day - What is racecar spelled backwards?




Closing for the day:

In closing remember everything is not always as it appears!!!!!!





Monday is in the books. Come back tomorrow for something!!!!

Burma Shave

So there I am sitting in the dentist's chair when I decide I better think of something to take my mind off the excruciating pain.

There are two things that make a man oblivious to pain and I chose the second to share with you.


AUTO NOSTALGIA

It is too bad today's generation never got to experience the signs along the highways. Let's step back in time to the Burma Shave signs.

Burma Shave signs were the precursor to modern billboard signs on America's earliest roads. They were an interesting diversion from long drives and began to spring up all over the country throughout the mid-twentieth century.

The Burma Shave Phenomenon was a symbol of America during the early 20th century. The signs would have one line on each sign ( normally five) spaced a distance apart with the last sign saying Burma Shave.


DON'T LOSE YOUR HEAD
TO GAIN A MINUTE
YOU NEED YOUR HEAD
YOUR BRAINS ARE IN IT
**Burma-Shave**




PASSING ON HILLS
AND CURVES, YOU KNOW
SHOULD ONLY BE DONE
AT A BEAUTY SHOW
**Burma-Shave**




THERE'S HARDLY
A MAN THAT'S NOW ALIVE
WHO PASSED ON HILLS
AT SEVENTY FIVE
**Burma-Shave**




TRAIN APPROACHING
WHISTLE SQUEALING
PAUSE - - AVOID THAT
RUN DOWN FEELING
**Burma-Shave**




FAMOUS LAST WORDS
BRIGHT LIGHTS THAT SHINE
IF YOU WON'T DIM YOURS
I WON'T DIM MINE
**Burma-Shave**




CAR IN DITCH
DRIVER IN TREE
MOON WAS FULL
AND SO WAS HE
**Burma-Shave**




DROVE TOO LONG
DRIVER SNOOZING
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT
IS NOT AMUSING
**Burma-Shave**




HER CHARIOT
RACED AT EIGHTY PER
THEY HAULED AWAY
WHAT HAD BEN HUR
**Burma-Shave**




WHEN YOU'RE FRISKY
FROM THE WHISKEY
DON'T BE DRIVING
'CAUSE IT'S RISKY
**Burma-Shave**




BROTHER SPEEDERS
LET'S REHEARSE
ALL TOGETHER
GOOD MORNING NURSE
**Burma-Shave**




DRINKING DRIVERS
NOTHING WORSE
HE PUT THE QUART
BEFORE THE HEARSE
**Burma-Shave**




ANGELS
WHO GUARD YOU
WHEN YOU DRIVE
USUALLY RETIRE AT 65
**Burma-Shave**




THIRTY DAYS
HATH SEPTEMBER
APRIL, JUNE
AND THE SPEED OFFENDER
**Burma-Shave**




CAUTIOUS RIDER
TO HER RECKLESS DEAR
LET'S HAVE LESS BULL
AND LOTS MORE STEER
**Burma-Shave**




THEY MISSED THE TURN
CAR WENT WHIZZIN
FAULT WAS HER'N
THE FUNERAL HIS'N
**Burma-Shave**




DON'T TRY PASSING
ON A SLOPE
UNLESS YOU HAVE
A PERISCOPE
**Burma-Shave**




LISTEN BIRDS
THESE SIGNS COST MONEY
SO ROOST AWHILE
BUT DON'T GET FUNNY
**Burma-Shave**




SPEED WAS HIGH
WEATHER WAS HOT
TIRES WERE THIN
X MARKS THE SPOT
**Burma-Shave**




HE SAW THE TRAIN
HE TRIED TO DUCK IT
KICKED FIRST THE GAS
AND THEN THE BUCKET
**Burma-Shave**




THERE'D BE MORE TRAFFIC
IN THE AIR
IF WE COULD PUT
THESE SIGNS UP THERE
**Burma-Shave**




SLOW DOWN, 'PA!
SAKES ALIVE
MA MISSED TWO SIGNS
FOUR AND FIVE
**Burma-Shave**




AROUND THE CURVE
LICKEDY--SPLIT
A BEAUTIFUL CAR
WASN'T IT
**Burma-Shave**




DRINKING DRIVERS
ENHANCE THEIR CHANCE
TO HIGHBALL HOME
IN AN AMBULANCE.
**Burma-Shave**




HANDS ON THE WHEEL
EYES ON THE ROAD
THAT'S THE SKILLFUL
DRIVERS CODE
**Burma-Shave**




FOLKS WOULDN'T FEEL
IN SO MUCH DANGER
IF WE STILL HAD
THE OL' LONE RANGER
**Burma-Shave**




A MAN - - A MISS
A CAR - - A CURVE
HE KISSED THE MISS
BUT MISSED THE CURVE
**Burma-Shave**




IT MAKES
THE FARMERS DAUGHTER
PLANT HER TULIPS
WHERE SHE OUGHTER
**Burma-Shave**




STATISTICS PROVE
NEAR AND FAR
THAT FOLKS WHO DRIVE
LIKE CRAZY ARE
**Burma-Shave**




IF YOU DON'T KNOW
WHOSE SIGNS THESE ARE
U CAN'T HAVE
DRIVEN VERY FAR
**Burma-Shave**




SPRING HAS SPRUNG
THE GRASS HAS RIZ
OVER WHERE LAST YEAR'S
CARELESS DRIVER IS
**Burma-Shave**




A MAN WHO PASSES
OVER HILLS AND CURVES
ISN'T A MAN OF IRON NERVES
HE'S CRAZY
**Burma-Shave**




DON'T STICK
YOUR ELBOW OUT TOO FAR
IT MIGHT GO HOME
IN ANOTHER CAR
**Burma-Shave**




To this day when I drive down the highways I miss those signs!!!


That's it for this week. Once again due to a drop in readers over the weekends, I too shall take the weekend off!!

Please peek in again on Monday to see how much of anything is here!!

Thursday

Editor's note: Wag's trip to the dentist has left him a little under the weather. Please check back tomorrow.

Higher Education

Teacher's pet - I wanna be teacher's pet!!!

We have all read that the student test scores have fallen. I suggest, based on this first story, it may be that the standardized tests have questions on the wrong subject or just maybe everybody wants to be held back in school.


Teacher Accused of Having Sex With Boys


CLINTON, S.C.- A middle school teacher accused of having sex with at least five boys - some of them students at her school - was arrested Wednesday.

Police began investigating Allenna Williams Ward, 23, after school officials recovered a note containing inappropriate messages.

Ward, who is married, had sexual encounters with the 14-and 15-year-old boys at various locations, including in the school, at a motel, in a park and behind a restaurant, from December to this month.

Some of the victims were students at Ward's school.

Ward was placed on administrative leave with pay last Thursday, acting district Superintendent Laura Koskela said.


She obviously wanted to tutor the kids in her class, nothing wrong there!!

She was teaching them patience, take your turn - first, second, third, fourth, fifth.

It appears she was teaching Driver's Ed as well by visiting locations such as school, a motel, a park and behind a restaurant.

She also was teaching a math class - five goes into one how many times???

Nowadays you get a lot better education a lot earlier in school than you used to!!!!

What's up with these schools anyway. Maybe they should have stayed as Junior High Schools instead of Middle Schools.

Besides, what genius in math made 7th and 8th the middle anyway?

K through 12 would be 13, and the middle of something is half so 13 divided in half would be?

Where I went to school not 7th or 8th, so now I am starting to see the problem.






Speaking of problems:

Texting 101: Don’t send pot messages to cop

Kentucky teacher allegedly sent trooper drug-deal details meant for dealer

MURRAY, Ky. - A middle school teacher trying to buy pot was arrested after she sent text messages to state trooper instead of a dealer.

Trooper Trevor Pervine was at dinner with his wife and parents celebrating a birthday when his phone started buzzing with messages about a marijuana purchase.

At first, Pervine thought the messages were from friends playing a joke, Kentucky State Police spokesman Barry Meadows said. But a couple of phone calls put that idea to rest, and Pervine responded to set up a meeting, Meadows said.

Authorities say Ann Greenfield, 34, arrived at the meeting point and found Pervine and other law enforcement officers waiting for her.

“She learned her lesson. Program your dealers into your phone,” Meadows said.

Greenfield, a teacher at Murray Middle School, was charged with conspiracy to traffic in controlled substances within 1,000 feet of a school, possession of marijuana and possession of drug paraphernalia, Meadows said.

She was suspended with pay pending results of an investigation, the Murray Independent School District said in a statement posted Friday on the district’s Web site.

She wanted a little buzz before she met with her students at various locations such as school, at a motel, in a park and behind a restaurant before she started tutoring her students.

Problem is, she is probably teaching computer keyboard classes rather than sex education.

The students are only as smart as the ones who teach them!!!






And then there are those who try to teach and are rewarded as follows:

Parents Beat Up Principal, Police Say

BARI, Italy - An irate Italian family beat up a principal because they were unhappy with the grades a young relative had received and a ban on cell phones at school.

Three male relatives, including the father and grandfather of the student, punched and pushed principal Ugo Castorina at the Lombardi middle school in Bari on Saturday.

They were angered by grades on the latest report card and by a recent ban by Castorina on cell phones at the school he has run for the past 22 years.

Castorina was taken to hospital and treated for mild contusions.

"Some people may not like it but standards must be set and rules must be respected if a school is to function," Castorina said.


Did you notice it's another middle school?

Does anyone else see a trend here? Kids today have it made!!!

Give them a phone, good grades, and sex, and all will be well in the world.






So let's turn to the dogs:

Dog With College Degree Called to Court

FOSTORIA, Ohio - An attorney challenging the authority of the city's police chief wants the department's police dog to appear in court as an exhibit, because he says the dog and the chief have criminal justice degrees from the same online school.

The issue gives "one pause, if not paws, for concern" about what it takes to get the degrees from the school based in the Virgin Islands, Gene Murray wrote in a court document filed Monday.

Murray is seeking to have a drug charge against a client dismissed by arguing that police Chief John McGuire - who is accused of lying on his job application - was not legally employed and had no authority as an officer.

McGuire is to go on trial in March on charges of falsification and tampering with records. A special prosecutor said McGuire lied on his application and resume about his rank, position, duties, responsibilities and salary in three of his previous jobs.

McGuire was hired as chief of this northwest Ohio city a year ago.

The union that represents Fostoria police officers and dispatchers filed a lawsuit challenging McGuire's hiring.

Murray said asking that the police dog, Rocko, show up in court at an evidence hearing is a key to discrediting McGuire, who took part in a traffic stop and search in October that resulted in drug possession charges against Clifford Green of Fostoria.

Both McGuire and Rocko, who is listed as John I. Rocko on his diploma, are graduates of Concordia College and University, according to copies of diplomas that are part of Murray's motion.

The court filing did not say how the attorney knows that diploma is for the dog or how Rocko allegedly managed to enroll in the college.

"My client had absolutely nothing to do with any animal getting a degree from an institution of higher learning," said McGuire's attorney, Dean Henry. "The whole thing is bizarre."

He said the dog was with the department before McGuire began working there.

Seneca County Prosecutor Ken Egbert said he will ask the judge to deny the request and limit the hearing to matters that are relevant.

"I don't think it's necessary to bring the actual dog," Egbert said.

Here is one dog that made it through Middle School and graduated college.

What person that has ever owned a dog thinks there is anything wrong with this story.

My dog could manage to enroll in the college and complete online courses. As a matter of fact she helped me type this!!!




And with that, we are outta here. Take a peek here again tomorrow of a whole bunch of nothing more or less!!!