Burma Shave

So there I am sitting in the dentist's chair when I decide I better think of something to take my mind off the excruciating pain.

There are two things that make a man oblivious to pain and I chose the second to share with you.


AUTO NOSTALGIA

It is too bad today's generation never got to experience the signs along the highways. Let's step back in time to the Burma Shave signs.

Burma Shave signs were the precursor to modern billboard signs on America's earliest roads. They were an interesting diversion from long drives and began to spring up all over the country throughout the mid-twentieth century.

The Burma Shave Phenomenon was a symbol of America during the early 20th century. The signs would have one line on each sign ( normally five) spaced a distance apart with the last sign saying Burma Shave.


DON'T LOSE YOUR HEAD
TO GAIN A MINUTE
YOU NEED YOUR HEAD
YOUR BRAINS ARE IN IT
**Burma-Shave**




PASSING ON HILLS
AND CURVES, YOU KNOW
SHOULD ONLY BE DONE
AT A BEAUTY SHOW
**Burma-Shave**




THERE'S HARDLY
A MAN THAT'S NOW ALIVE
WHO PASSED ON HILLS
AT SEVENTY FIVE
**Burma-Shave**




TRAIN APPROACHING
WHISTLE SQUEALING
PAUSE - - AVOID THAT
RUN DOWN FEELING
**Burma-Shave**




FAMOUS LAST WORDS
BRIGHT LIGHTS THAT SHINE
IF YOU WON'T DIM YOURS
I WON'T DIM MINE
**Burma-Shave**




CAR IN DITCH
DRIVER IN TREE
MOON WAS FULL
AND SO WAS HE
**Burma-Shave**




DROVE TOO LONG
DRIVER SNOOZING
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT
IS NOT AMUSING
**Burma-Shave**




HER CHARIOT
RACED AT EIGHTY PER
THEY HAULED AWAY
WHAT HAD BEN HUR
**Burma-Shave**




WHEN YOU'RE FRISKY
FROM THE WHISKEY
DON'T BE DRIVING
'CAUSE IT'S RISKY
**Burma-Shave**




BROTHER SPEEDERS
LET'S REHEARSE
ALL TOGETHER
GOOD MORNING NURSE
**Burma-Shave**




DRINKING DRIVERS
NOTHING WORSE
HE PUT THE QUART
BEFORE THE HEARSE
**Burma-Shave**




ANGELS
WHO GUARD YOU
WHEN YOU DRIVE
USUALLY RETIRE AT 65
**Burma-Shave**




THIRTY DAYS
HATH SEPTEMBER
APRIL, JUNE
AND THE SPEED OFFENDER
**Burma-Shave**




CAUTIOUS RIDER
TO HER RECKLESS DEAR
LET'S HAVE LESS BULL
AND LOTS MORE STEER
**Burma-Shave**




THEY MISSED THE TURN
CAR WENT WHIZZIN
FAULT WAS HER'N
THE FUNERAL HIS'N
**Burma-Shave**




DON'T TRY PASSING
ON A SLOPE
UNLESS YOU HAVE
A PERISCOPE
**Burma-Shave**




LISTEN BIRDS
THESE SIGNS COST MONEY
SO ROOST AWHILE
BUT DON'T GET FUNNY
**Burma-Shave**




SPEED WAS HIGH
WEATHER WAS HOT
TIRES WERE THIN
X MARKS THE SPOT
**Burma-Shave**




HE SAW THE TRAIN
HE TRIED TO DUCK IT
KICKED FIRST THE GAS
AND THEN THE BUCKET
**Burma-Shave**




THERE'D BE MORE TRAFFIC
IN THE AIR
IF WE COULD PUT
THESE SIGNS UP THERE
**Burma-Shave**




SLOW DOWN, 'PA!
SAKES ALIVE
MA MISSED TWO SIGNS
FOUR AND FIVE
**Burma-Shave**




AROUND THE CURVE
LICKEDY--SPLIT
A BEAUTIFUL CAR
WASN'T IT
**Burma-Shave**




DRINKING DRIVERS
ENHANCE THEIR CHANCE
TO HIGHBALL HOME
IN AN AMBULANCE.
**Burma-Shave**




HANDS ON THE WHEEL
EYES ON THE ROAD
THAT'S THE SKILLFUL
DRIVERS CODE
**Burma-Shave**




FOLKS WOULDN'T FEEL
IN SO MUCH DANGER
IF WE STILL HAD
THE OL' LONE RANGER
**Burma-Shave**




A MAN - - A MISS
A CAR - - A CURVE
HE KISSED THE MISS
BUT MISSED THE CURVE
**Burma-Shave**




IT MAKES
THE FARMERS DAUGHTER
PLANT HER TULIPS
WHERE SHE OUGHTER
**Burma-Shave**




STATISTICS PROVE
NEAR AND FAR
THAT FOLKS WHO DRIVE
LIKE CRAZY ARE
**Burma-Shave**




IF YOU DON'T KNOW
WHOSE SIGNS THESE ARE
U CAN'T HAVE
DRIVEN VERY FAR
**Burma-Shave**




SPRING HAS SPRUNG
THE GRASS HAS RIZ
OVER WHERE LAST YEAR'S
CARELESS DRIVER IS
**Burma-Shave**




A MAN WHO PASSES
OVER HILLS AND CURVES
ISN'T A MAN OF IRON NERVES
HE'S CRAZY
**Burma-Shave**




DON'T STICK
YOUR ELBOW OUT TOO FAR
IT MIGHT GO HOME
IN ANOTHER CAR
**Burma-Shave**




To this day when I drive down the highways I miss those signs!!!


That's it for this week. Once again due to a drop in readers over the weekends, I too shall take the weekend off!!

Please peek in again on Monday to see how much of anything is here!!