Losers

Have you seen or heard of the T.V. show 'Biggest Loser'? I smell another similar reality show:

Fat Pets Compete in Weight-Loss Contest

LONDON - Eight of Britain's fattest pets are to embark on a 100-day diet and fitness regime in a bid to crown this year's pet fit club champion.

The seven dogs and one cat, who are all more than 30 percent overweight and weigh a combined total of 421 pounds, were picked by veterinary charity PDSA who are running the slimming contest.

The animals, who need to lose a total of 163 pounds to reach their ideal weight, will be put on specially tailored diet and exercise programs.

The pet who achieves the biggest percentage weight loss and best follows their new regime will be crowned champion, winning their owner a pet-friendly holiday.

My dog Zoe' read this story and said she hoped her personal baker, Pat, doesn't stop making Zoe' bites.



Just how much money can you make standing on a corner with a "please help" cardboard sign?

Homeless man to pay $101 million for starting forest fires

LOS ANGELES - A homeless man was sentenced Monday to 45 months in prison and ordered to pay more than $101 million in restitution for starting two fires, including a 2006 blaze that burned more than 163,000 acres in Los Padres National Forest.

U.S. District Judge Valerie Baker Fairbank sentenced Steven Emory Butcher, 50, after he was convicted in February of starting the 2006 Day Fire by burning debris at his campsite as well as the smaller Ellis Fire in the same forest in 2002.

"I threw a cigarette butt or two on the pile," Butcher told the judge. "I tried everything to put it out. I'm afraid of fire."

"The fact that in 2006 he engaged in virtually the same conduct as in 2002 shows extreme recklessness," the judge said, pointing out the defendant suffered from paranoid schizophrenia, depression and alcoholism.

I'll bet he contacts the government requesting some of the $700 million dollar bailout package.



He could try the U.S. Postal service:

Inmate escapes German jail in cardboard box

A manhunt is underway in west Germany for a convicted drug dealer who escaped by mailing himself out of jail. The 42-year-old Turkish citizen--who was serving a seven-year sentence--had been making stationery in a prison workshop. At the end of his shift, the inmate climbed into a cardboard box and was taken out of prison by express courier. His whereabouts are still unknown.



But then again, jail must not be all that bad.

Ky. inmate who escaped jail returns on own

PADUCAH, Ky. -Chad Toy's escape from jail wasn't what shocked his jailers; it was his plea to be let back in. "When I rang the bell at the jail and told them who I was, they were surprised," Toy told The Paducah (Ky.) Sun newspaper. "I guess they haven't seen that before."

Let me in whee-ooh (whee-ooh, whee-ooh, hoop-whee-ooh)
(Whee-ooh, whee-ooh, hoo-ooh-oop-whee-ooh, whee-ooh)

I can see the dancin' (let me in)
The silhouettes on the shade
I hear the music, all the lovers on parade
Open up (let me in), I wanna come in again
I thought you were my friend
Pitter patter of those fee-ee-ee-ee-eet
Movin' and a-groovin' with that be-eat
Jumpin' and stompin on the flo-o-o-o-oor
(Lemme in) Let me in!
(Open up) Open up!
Why don't you open up that door? (let me in)