Friday's Goofiness

Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time?

A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying "Guns don't kill people. I do."


Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light
and a flashing yellow traffic light?

A: The color.


Q: When driving through fog, what should you use?

A: Your car.


If it's not here, it only means one thing... it's somewhere else!

I hate when I wish on a star only to realize afterward that I just wished on an airplane.

The problem nowadays is stupidity. Why don't we just take the safety labels off everything and see what happens?

If your parents never had children, the chances are that you won't either.

The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.

Dumb people are just blissfully unaware of how dumb they really are.

When you're arguing with an idiot, make sure the other person isn't doing the same thing.

I don't condone stupidity, I promote it.

Do you realize if Edison didn't invent electricity, we would be watching T.V by candlelight?

24 hours a day? When's night?

Pitching is 80% of the game. The other half is hitting and fielding.

I have opinions of my own - strong opinions - but I don't always agree with them.

The trouble with real life is that there is no background music.

Life is waaay too short to be normal!

How do you wake up dead?

How do you spell FBI?

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

I never apologize. I'm sorry, but that's just the way I am.

I am wondering what my brain is thinking right now.

Wouldn't it be nice if, whenever we messed up our life, we could simply press 'Ctr Alt Delete' and start all over?