Gray Hair

Life and Aging

You start the game of life with a full pot of luck and an empty pot of experience.

The object is to fill the pot of experience before you empty the pot of luck.

If you wait, all that happens is that you get older.

Some people try to turn back their odometers.

Not me. I want people to know why I look this way.

I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.

They say with age comes wisdom. Well I have the age but maybe not the wisdom.

Case in point:

My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.

She asked, 'What's on TV?'

I said, 'Dust.'

And then the fight started...

It is said when you get older you should exercise to stay healthy.

I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks.

Haven't lost a pound.

Apparently you have to go there.

I know I got a lot of exercise the last few years just getting over the hill.

The advantage of exercising every day is so when you die, they'll say, 'Well, he looks good, doesn't he.'

Walking can add minutes to your life.

This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $7000 per month.

A friend of mine started walking five miles a day when he was 60.

Now he's 97 years old and we don't know where he is.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

The only reason I would take up walking is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.